Does the bad economy make for strange bedfellows?

Hi there,

I have been saving articles on how bad economic times cause folks to stay together since last fall. These pieces have been really prevalent and I had been wondering what it was that made my practice and the domestic relations practice in general at Burns & Levinson different.  We have been extraordinarily busy since January.  I had come to the conclusion that because most of our cases are high end divorces the bad economy was causing more of my clients to move forward rather than wait.  This was confirmed by an article in the American Bar Association Journal.

I think the reality for the decrease in some divorce practices is more complex than simply a result of the recession.  If you look at this post from the Freaknomics blog it is clear that divorce is decreasing not as a result of economic change, but just as a general demographic reality.

I would love to think that this is because people are becoming wiser or kinder, and that may be true, or more likely the young middle aged generation now is the first generation to grow up that were children of divorce, and children of divorce understand firsthand what divorce means.

Best,

Nancy

Jon minus Kate

Hi there,

I know a topic is hot when before I hit my desk in the morning at least 5 people ask me if I saw Jon & Kate discuss their pending divorce on TV last night.  Since I have never seen the show (Jon & Kate Plus 8) my answer was no but it seems to have an unholy fascination, even for divorce lawyers. I understand the Gosselins publically renewed their vows last year so perhaps that was the kiss of death

I am not sure if it is the reality show media circus or the adorable plethora of kids, but there is no mistaking the fascination. This article from www.smartmoney.com provides a vehicle for a discussion of some issues about divorce which may not ordinarily get raised.

Enjoy!

Best,

Nancy

Tips: Dealing With Elder Financial Abuse

After reading the article, "Lawyer reports twice as many calls about elder financial abuse" I asked my colleague Lisa Cukier to write a guest post, as she has years of experience dealing with this issue. This type of problem seems to surface when families are under stress.   

Hope this is useful,

Best,
Nancy

Guest post by Lisa M. Cukier, Esq., Partner at Burns & Levinson LLP.  Ms. Cukier concentrates her practice in all aspects of probate litigation, fiduciary litigation, planning & litigation for blended families, same-sex couples, guardianship, conservatorship, mental health law, elder law and domestic relations.

Unfortunately it is not uncommon for friends, family and home health companions to exploit elders for their money and property. All too often, people step into an elder’s life in their final years, initially offering help, but later insidiously swaying elders’ thoughts about family members and creating fear about being placed in a nursing home or about the government taking the elders’ assets. These folks who may have had good intentions at first, later insinuate themselves into others’ estate plans and convince elders to gift them money or deed real estate over to themselves. Sometimes, elders feel dependent and weakened and are manipulated late in life to change their estate plans or to make gifts or sign deeds that leave out family members and long-term friends.

Reverse The Transaction!
Massachusetts law provides a mechanism for invalidating Wills and Deeds and asset transfers that are the product of undue influence or that occurred when a person lacked mental capacity. If the abuse is discovered while the elder is alive, a family member or a guardian can sue to rescind and revoke the Will or Deed. If the elder has already died, a family member or the executor or administrator of the decedent’s estate can sue to rescind and revoke. Massachusetts law also provides a mechanism for recovering assets that were wrongfully given away during a person’s life. Gifts and transfers can literally be undone and the Court can force bad actors to give back wrongfully transferred funds.

Plan for Protection Before The Damage is Done.
Don’t let this happen to you or your loved ones. A well-crafted Durable Power of Attorney can be used to prevent financial exploitation. This is a document by which one person nominates a trusted other person to manage and protect finances in the event of incapacity or mental weakness. The legal authority to manage other’s finances is a critical part of any estate plan, but can have tragic ramifications unless the authority is tempered with safeguards. First, in the selection of a fiduciary, nominate someone trustworthy and reliable. As an additional safeguard, consider naming a lawyer as well as a family member to serve as co-fiduciaries. To avoid unbridled use of the Durable Power of Attorney, have the lawyer draft the document to require the fiduciary to account to the lawyer semi-annually. To prevent the document from getting into the wrong hands too soon, have the lawyer escrow it at her office with the agreement that it will only be released to the fiduciary upon receipt of a doctor’s letter certifying that the elder lacks mental capacity to the extent that the document is now needed.

Step 10: Trial - Avoid it if you can

Hi There,

If you are one of the approximately 95% of couples whose divorce will settle by agreement, be grateful; for the remaining 5%, this post is the barest of bare-bones descriptions of the process.

Trials are very artificial creatures and the preparation immediately leading up to them is easily as long and costly as the trial itself.  You should expect to spend time with your attorney getting prepared for trial, going over the questions she will ask you and preparing you for cross examination.  She will of course be preparing exhibits and the questioning of other witnesses as well.

The trial itself follows a clear set of rules, the plaintiff's attorney and the defendant's attorney make opening statements, then the plaintiff's attorney calls her first witness and asks him questions, this is called direct examination. Then the defendant's attorney has the opportunity to cross examine the witness.  Then the plaintiff's attorney has the opportunity to clarify (or try to fix) any damage done on cross and generally this then is repeated with the second witness, etc. This continues until the plaintiff has finished putting in her case.  Then it is the defendant's turn and the same process continues.  There are very arcane rules as to how to ask questions and what evidence is admissible.  In Massachusetts, private discussions between Husband and Wife, with a few exceptions, cannot be testified to.

At the close of the evidence some judges like to hear closing arguments from the lawyers, but most do not.  After the trial the lawyers generally have some time to prepare further written submissions for the Court based on the evidence that has come in at trial 

A trial is NOT the forum to try for one-upsmanship on your soon-to-be ex.  Remember that your demeanor may be as important as your words.  So...regardless of what is said: do not make faces, do not sigh audibly or in any way indicate that you disagree with what  the other side is saying.

Generally you will wait a while to receive the decision.  Judges are supposed to render them within 90 days but this is rare.  I have had cases take over a year.  Another good reason to settle.

Best,

Nancy

Guess Who Is Checking Out Your Facebook Profile?!

Hi There,

I write a blog, my daughter is going to show me how Facebook works and I have a bunch of friends who tweet on twitter. This is really an Internet universe - or as some call it, a 'blogosphere' or 'twitterverse'.  And in the Internet universe there may be fewer than six degrees of separation.  There is a tendency to think that one's personal communications on the Internet are private, but as this Time article shows, they are not.

If you are in a divorce or contemplating one, be careful of what you say on Facebook or on any of the other social media sites.  There is no advantage to chatting about your divorce and how awful the other side is in public and there is a real risk that they may see what you have written.  This may hurt your case, give ammunition to the other side, and could clue them in to what your strategy is.

You would think this would go without saying, but do not show up on a dating site until AFTER you have separated.  Dating sites are not private.  Divorce attorneys are very aware of the pitfalls of our very open Internet world.  If we have reason to think we might find something we will search the Internet.  

Best,
Nancy

N.H. Closer to Same Sex Marriage Law

Hi There,
 
Here I am posting on gay marriage yet again.  Because I am a divorce lawyer and because I have been married for 44 years, marriage is obviously something I think about regularly, both personally and professionally.  There are so many significant legal rights that attach to marriage that I have long believed that same sex couples should have the right to marry.
 
Like the pro-choice and pro-life arguments, this is a debate that cuts across political parties, although you would not know it by the way it is reported.
 
It looks as if New Hampshire will vote to allow same sex marriage as well.  Go New England!
 
Best,
 
Nancy

Step 9: The Uncontested Divorce Hearing or "Is That All There Is?!"

Hello there,

The uncontested divorce hearing is often a culture shock to the participants.  While there is a great deal of ceremony around the actual act of marriage, divorce itself has all the charm of a trip to the Registry of Motor Vehicles.

Everyone needs to attend the hearing.  When the case name is called the clients and their attorneys stand at the counsel table.  The Judge may or may not read the agreement.  The attorney for the plaintiff (remember the plaintiff?  He or she is the one who filed) asks her client a series of very simple questions, name, address, date of marriage, date of separation, etc.  The Judge will ask the same questions if there aren't attorneys present and then the Judge will ask each party if the financial statements are accurate and if they believe the other party's financial statement is also accurate and then the Judge asks a series of questions designed to preclude anyone in the future attempting to set the agreement aside due to buyer's remorse, i.e. do you understand the agreement?  Did anyone coerce you into signing?  Do you think it's fair and reasonable? ..etc. Then the Judge explains how long it will be 'til the divorce is final (depending on the type of filing, 90 days or 120 days).  She then wishes everyone well and the divorce is over.

Having stood next to countless clients at this moment I know that it feels overwhelming and somehow anticlimactic.  There is no real recognition that this is a truly life altering event.  Be prepared, even if you are happy to have the process itself end, to be a bit shaken by the actual hearing.

Best,

Nancy

Who, or what, is a parent coordinator?

Hi There,

When parents cannot communicate or agree after a divorce a parent coordinator is sometime used to help resolve matters. There's a very interesting article in this week's issue of Massachusetts Lawyer's Weekly which gives a much more in- depth presentation. if you are involved in any custody or disputed parenting actions you might want to read it.

There is a dispute among divorce practitioners as to the utility of parent coordinators.  A few extremely good divorce litigators  refuse to use parent coordinators at all. I happen to think that in the right circumstances and with the right parent coordinator they can be invaluable. No matter how much a parent coordinator charges, it will be less than the costs of litigation. I also think there is a true psychological benefit to the kids to keeping their parents out of court.  

May you never need a parent coordinator.

Best,

Nancy

Some useful tips

Hi there;

I've been on trial (lawyers like saying that it makes us sound John Grishamish) and I haven't had time to post, I hate it when that happens.

However, a friend just sent me a link to a collaborative law blog that had a great series of suggestions for how to minimize the collateral damage to children in divorce cases.

Even if you don't have children many of these are suggestions that may make your divorce process less contentious and thus less expensive.

Best,

Nancy